Oh Yeah: Happy New Year

Just think of this: if you’re on the Julian calendar, it’s not even the new year yet. Same for the Chinese calendar. And obviously, the Jewish New Year is nowhere in sight. So keep these things in mind before you accuse me of being remiss in my electronic New Year’s greetings to the world.

I’m in Grand Forks right now. It has been a most relaxing time. I was the guest organist at my church, organized a sledding/Super Action Ball day with my high school friends, talked to my high school choir teacher, Mr. Sherwood. It was very good to see all of these high school people. Good to know we haven’t totally fallen out of touch or any such thing. I made sushi (twice) with my family’s Japanese exchange student, Kota. I bowled with Kota and my brother and two Swedes at an exchange student Christmas party (if you think this is a bit late, see the first paragraph).

Now, a story. I guess I would be remiss if I didn’t finally explain for the record what exactly Super Action Ball is, now that I’ve mentioned it again. This story begins, oddly enough, with a T-shirt. One day in Stephenson Hall about two years ago, local resident Sir Dennis was walking around wearing this shirt with writing upon it. And lo, the writing upon the shirt said, “I Won at Super Action Ball.” Being naturally curious, I inquired as to the meaning of these strange words. Dennis told me that he had no idea to what primeval sport the shirt was referring, but he had bought a 12-pack of these garments off of the magical marketplace known to most as eBay. I thought that the shirt was quite imbued with the jolly spirits of hilarity, so I inquired to Sir Dennis if he might bestow one upon me. He readily offered it as a gift, and I accepted.

A few days afterward, in a time closer to the present and with less medieval speech, my friends and I decided to take a break from studying from finals and take advantage of the snow that has recently covered our area. It won’t last long, so you must be sure to use it while it lasts. So that evening we left to go sledding on a campus hill, wearing plastic bag suits. See, since Kansans do not have real sleds for the most part, they have to fashion crude substitutes, like plastic bag suits in which you slide down a hill unassisted by a sled. On the way to the hill I spied a laundry basket that appeared to have been used as another such primitive sled substitute. Knowing that the men of Stephenson were bound to find some interesting use for it, I brought it along to the hill. Then, after the first few runs, inspiration struck, and Super Action Ball (as we know it) was born.

Super Action Ball involves any number of teams of two sliding down a hill, not on sleds but rather Super Action Suits (see aforementioned plastic bags). These pairs are attempting to get the Super Action Ball (which isn’t so much a ball as it is that laundry basket or some other non-spherical object; boxes and bottles have also been used) and carry it across the line to score a Super Action Goal Unit (SAGU, if you wish; it sounds pretty good as a South American-style soccer cheer: “SAGUUUUUUUUU!!!!!”) Naturally, tackling is allowed and encouraged, but in order to keep the game moving, if one is tackled, one must throw up the Super Action Ball, preferably to your teammate. Initially, the Super Action Ball was placed behind a Super Action Box (regular, ordinary cardboard box), but now it is customary to place it inside the SA Box. The first time the referee put it inside caused much confusion; it was pretty funny watching everyone, myself included, try to figure out where the Super Action Ball had gone. Now a number of other random items can sometimes be found in the Super Action Box, including, but not limited to, a Super Action Bowl (regular, ordinary metal bowl) or Super Action Frisbees (regular, ordinary plastic Frisbees). Finally, there is the unnecessary tackling rule, which states that whenever a SAGU is scored, as many people must tackle the scorer as possible.

Super Action Ball has been played every winter since then--that is, whenever snow is kind enough to show up in Kansas. And as I mentioned earlier, I recently introduced the game to North Dakota. Still, without official “rules,” the game is flexible. For example, in the last two games people have played the position of Enforcer or Troll. This person attempts to tackle everyone and has no interest in scoring SAGUs, just causing mayhem. The Enforcer certainly makes the game even more fun, although players should beware if a plastic pool is present on your Super Action Slope. The Enforcer may throw it at you.

Some of you may be wondering if I ever followed up on the shirts to discover the true origins of the name of the game. Of course I did. Some quick Google searching revealed that the game is also some sort of gambling thing played at a Reno, NV casino. I guess that would explain the presence of “John Ascuaga's Nugget” on the shirts that started it all.

I would encourage all of you to try this game. It’s really quite fun and a great new take on sledding. And I am proud to say that now the random shirt from eBay is true, because I have won at Super Action Ball many times.